The Value of Self Seduction
It's so easy to only allow ourselves to experience seduction, arousal, body rocking worship, and sexual pleasure within the paradigm of shared sex.
A dual union between ourselves and another.
One receiving pleasure, one dolling it out.
Maybe a switch part way through, maybe not.
Hopefully both partners are satisfied.
And again, maybe not.
Few of us really look into our sexual patterns with the desire to explore ways we fuel our own expansion and growth as sexual and soulful beings, but this is a FANTASTIC place to begin looking AND acting in ways that will bring us more of what we want.
Obviously you’re willing to, or you wouldn’t be in my community!
Good thing too, because today, we’re diving in deeper.
But not in the spectrum of Partnered Pleasure.
Today I’m inviting you to go on your OWN Erotic journey for this week’s Erotica Story.
Why? Because the way you are with yourself is going to be the limit setter with a partner as well.
If you think your body is gross and aren’t willing to touch it and look at it, you’re going to have this manifest with your coupled pleasure acts. It may not be so black and white as a literal mirrored act, but I promise it’s influencing your experiences.
If you rush your pleasure, forcing yourself to cum in 10 minutes or less with tricks, creams, and toys, you’re also likely to hold this pattern in shared experiences. With yourself AND your lover.
**NOTE** The above example of masturbation/self pleasure is NOT what I mean when I talk about a Self Pleasure Practice!!! That’s akin to forced orgasms. More on that later.
If you don’t give yourself slow seduction and acts of regular erotic joy and experience throughout the day, you’re less likely to share this with a partner as well.
My point is this: Do you embody the actions, experiences, and cravings you desire from a dreamy lover with your OWN self care and pleasure?
Then we have work to do.
Because until you make THOSE desires a reality for YOURSELF, you’re going to have a much harder time attaining AND sustaining that with a lover --whether you have one now, or hope to in the future.
My aim is to help you sink deeper into yourself, to explore what YOUR unique Self Seduction Practice might look like.
Many women come to me looking for help reclaiming their body, sustaining desire and libido, feeling a deeper and more expansive level of pleasure in their bodies, etc.
And when I ask them what their current self pleasure practices are, I get a varying set of responses, all revolving around one thing. Masturbation.
Here are the most common replies:
I masturbate frequently, but it doesn’t help the frustration!
I masturbate off and on, but it’s nothing mind-blowing.
I don’t masturbate. That’s what a partner is for.
I don’t enjoy it. It doesn’t help.
I don’t like touching myself, it feels dirty and gross.
It’s rare that I get a response like: “OMG!!!! I rock my body soooo fucking good! I seduce myself as a lifestyle, and I love pleasuring myself. I can get lost in my body for HOURS!!!!”
But babe, that’s EXACTLY where I want ALL of us to be!
Can you fathom feeling that way about yourself?
About your own love, adoration, fascination, and skill with your own body?
Start imagining, my loves…
Cause that’s exactly where we’re going with this week’s story.
This will be especially helpful if you’re a woman who WANTS a self pleasure practice, but doesn’t really KNOW what one might look like.
See you in the next post where we dive right in!